Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Balance Beam Living: Boundaries and Truth-speaking

Thinking today about a challenging balance...truth-speaking and speaking for myself.

 Like one of my heroes Danny Silk says:  I manage me. You manage you. I don't try to manage you.  I don't let you manage me. 

This has been a foundation stone of my growth in boundary setting (from pretty much no boundaries ever to generally sane boundaries most of the time!).

"I don't try to manage you".....The principle of not speaking for others who are perfectly able to speak for themselves. Not speaking as if I know who someone else is, what they should do and why.   

How do I balance this with the principle of truth-speaking with a loving attitude and intention?
here's my unfinished, in-process thinking: Jesus rarely told anyone what to do. He taught principles. Told stories with hidden treasures inside that could help someone change their way of thinking and seeing.

He also spoke truth to the controlling religious leaders of his time. he wasn't afraid to say, "No. That's not what love looks like" or "You put burdens on the shoulders of the people and don't do a thing to help them."

Realize that "managing me" means I speak for myself, not for others. When I speak only for myself, I don't "get" to be "right." I only get to take responsibility for myself. Darn! I want to be "right."  (Whining ensues...I should get to be right because I think alot. So much more than those "other" people. Or because I'm all about justice. Or because....")

Because I'm not Jesus - I'm only me...sometimes volatile and reactive....sometimes thoughtful..sometimes not....do I ever really speak "truth"?  Do I even know it?

Is it enough for me to do my best with the whole "light shining" thing and trust that Truth will be visible if I'm living it?

How can I learn to love and speak truth? To manage me and love others. To give up being right and still desire my life and words to reflect Truth?

Thinking a lot wears me out. I need lunch. Possibly a doughnut.

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