Home-making

this weekend I put together a chair and ottoman from ikea.  The pictures-only directions didn't help me much.  There was muttering, outcries, and a couple of less-than-presentable terms used.  In the end, I did what I didn't think the directions were saying and finally got the parts attached to the right other parts - facing the right directions.  Now, Im sitting in this comfy chair with my feet up.

I ordered a twin mattress, bookshelf, and a second chair.  Once the mattress arrived, I got rid of the full-sized bed that took up (no kidding) half my little room.  Rolled out the beautiful wool rug I brought from madison.  Some special items - beautiful cobalt blue glass balls in a bowl.  An art tile of a woman with auburn hair. An earth-toned tray with beveled glass center.   All these things now reside in my little space.

It is becoming a home.  A safe place of r & r for me.  A welcoming, warm place where my daughter Beth visited. We ate sushi and talked.  Home.

I am so grateful for this place.  I know God brought me here and I don't take it for granted that I have this space.

This month one of the women who comes to Nail Day every single week was in trouble. She was afraid she might harm herself and checked into a hospital. BJM staff were the people she listed as "emergency contacts" - she had no one else.  BJM is her family.  Her address?  a shelter for women in the Tenderloin. This is one meaning of the word "homeless"....to be truly without a home. Someone else's address used as a temporary fill-in-the-blank for social services or medical providers.

Another woman showed up recently in San Francisco. She is paranoid, often roams from topic to topic in conversation, and seems "stuck" in painful memories of the past.   Those memories are a kind of "home" for her. She returns to them when she feels afraid. She hopes that their resolution might stop the emotional pain.  She comes to the women's center on Tuesday and Wednesday. To nail day every Monday.  Because Justice Matters and the women's center has become a sanctuary for her.  A home, of sorts.

Because Justice Matters isn't a "big result" program. Our numbers aren't large.  Our impact is small and personal.  It is all about relationships.  One-on-one.  Small groups seated around a table.  5 or 6 cups and a pot of hot coffee.

I want to learn how to open my heart to help create a home for women.  To make space and time in my life for relationships that really mean something. That offer safety. Knowing and being known.
Relationships. Family. Home.